Don't have to live like a refugee

I have occasionally wondered if I were the type of person who could live off the grid, eschewing material possessions, squatting with like minded people and leading a more simplified existence.

I tell you now that I could not. After living through one of three weeks of the epic decorating project, I can't find anything. Boxes are getting shifted from room to room willy-nilly and even things I've unpacked are never to hand when I'd like them. I can only find two pairs of trousers, I have limited access to my washing machine and I am distressed, I tell you.

The rooms that the decorators have finished are miraculously transformed. The house will be gorgeous when it is done. But oh how I wish that I could escape to St Tropez or on Safari until it is all done.